New Expansion for Skyrim Revealed! — April 01, 2017
In a surprise announcement, Bethesda Softworks has announced a new expansion for The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Special Edition to celebrate the 15th anniversary of The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, several years since the last DLC was released for the game. Even more surprisingly, this expansion, which is named The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Special Edition: Nerevarine, will be exclusively released to the upcoming Nintendo Switch version of the game. "When people think Elder Scrolls, they also immediately think about Nintendo. We're just two companies made for each other. They really understand our creative vision. I mean, haven't you played 'Breath of the Wild'?" Said Pete Hines in the initial announcement.
The newly revealed Nerevarine expansion will see the Dragonborn face his greatest threat and foe yet, Nerevar Reborn. "When we wanted to return to Skyrim, we wanted the return to be big, to mean a lot to the fans who were going to have to buy an entirely new console just to experience this exclusive content." Todd Howard stated, when asked for comment. "That's why we decided to do something no other Elder Scrolls game out right now had thought to do, and allow the player to return to Vvardenfell for this epic showdown between the Nerevarine and the Dohvakiin." When we pointed out the upcoming release of Morrowind for The Elder Scrolls Online, he replied "Oh, are they still doing that? I didn't really play it, it seemed really long. Besides, our version is probably going to be better anyway. We're going to be bringing back the Morag Tong, and Vivec, and you'll get to explore Telvanni Mushroom Towers... it's really going to be great." When we pointed out that the ESO version of Morrowind would also include all of those things, an increasingly upset Todd responded "Well you know what they can't have? The Nerevarine! We got him, and he's really interesting and went on tons of adventures that you get to learn about from his time in Akavir. Like take this for example..." He paused, as he sorted through his notes. As he kept going through them, he eventually stopped entirely, went pale, and then stormed out of the interview, leaving behind his notes. After examining it, the page in question was labeled "Notes on Nerevarine", with most of the text on the page having been blacked out, with a crudely written message stating "TODD SMEELS", underneath a stick figure with smell lines, and an arrow pointing to the stick figure labeled "Todd".
We attempted to reach out to ZeniMax Online Studios for comment afterwards, which only received a short response from Rich Lambert: "Haha, did you see if he cried? Hey Schick, it totally worked!" before he left, high fiving everyone he passed on his way out.
The Nintendo Switch version of Skyrim is set to release in Fall, 2017, alongside this expansion. As more details emerge, we will keep you updated.
From your favorite reporter, April Olof.