Better Cities:The Lusted Argonian Maid, Part IV

Book Information The Lusted Argonian Maid, Part IV
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This Elder Scrolls Book Club selection was written by Redolegna.

The Lusted Argonian Maid, Part IV

by Crassius Curio

The uncensored original version of The Lusty Argonian Maid

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ct IV: In the house guestroom

Scene I (The Priest; Lifts-Her-Tail)

The Priest: I am utterly sorry, dear child. I tried my best, but my Twin Lamps acquaintance turned me down. They will not help us, not even with so few risks.

Lifts-Her-Tail (worried): Poor me! I told the Thieves Guild that Colto would not send the Ordinators after them if they crept into his house. If they're caught, they will have me dead!

The Priest: It appears we are left with only one choice, then. It is against my vows, but to help you, I would serve the Underking himself. I'll come back this night and the both of us will see that Colto doesn't disturb us anymore.

Lifts-Her-Tail: No, no! It's too dangerous for you! You'd lose your rank and your honor because of me!

The Priest: My honor would be lost if I didn't help you, leaving you in Colto and your mistress's hands. As for my rank, it has never been much. And if the Divines let those things happen, I deny them and do not want to serve them any longer!

Lifts-Her-Tail: Yet we're not strong enough to carry Colto outside of this house!

The Priest: Not to worry... I am considering to chop him into little pieces and to throw them in the sea. (Lifts-Her-Tail pales) No, dear child, only joking. I made my time in the legion, as any poor Imperial has to. My arms have still some strength. I hope it will be enough to bring him away.

(Exit the Priest)

Scene II (Lifts-Her-Tail)

Lifts-Her-Tail (doing what she says in this order): Let's have a look... Has Colto put a lock on his luggage. No? The fool! Well, it is fine for me. My new Guild will soon see that I be able to pick a lock properly, though I'm helpless with them. What do I see? He has worn off his jewels? Odd, but then, who am I to complain? Thanks, Master Colto, for making my work so much easier. Oh, you planned to offer this beautiful golden bracelet to my mistress? Well, I take it for the beatings I have endured. And these clothes? I take it in payment for the salt. This collar, for the insults! But what is it that I am hearing? Would that be him coming? Don't panic, Lifts-Her-Tail, play the sweet, innocent and foolish Argonian to the very end! Say stupid things in a coy manner. Act as if you were hiding lust for him. Make him mad with desire! Slow the pace of your voice so that he doesn't notice what changes you have been through!

Crantius's Colto voice: Who is in there? A burglar?

Scene III (Lifts-Her-Tail; Crantius Colto)

Lifts-Her-Tail: Certainly not, kind sir! I am here but to clean your chambers.

Crantius Colto: Is that all you have come here for, little one? My chambers?

Lifts-Her-Tail: I have no idea what it is you imply, master. I am but a poor Argonian maid.

Crantius Colto: So you are, my dumpling. And a good one at that. Such strong legs and shapely tail.

Lifts-Her-Tail: You embarrass me, sir!

Crantius Colto: Fear not. You are safe here with me.

Lifts-Her-Tail: I must finish my cleaning, sir. The mistress will have my head if I do not!

Crantius Colto: Cleaning, eh? I have something for you. Here, polish my spear.

Lifts-Her-Tail: But it is huge! It could take me all night!

Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.

Lifts-Her-Tail: Command then, master, and I shall obey.

Crantius Colto (careful not to be heard by Lifts-Her-Tail): Sweet moment which I have longed for! Now is the time for my dreams to be fulfilled! Lifts-Her-Tail, your mistress will wait for a few hours, until midnight if it must be (speaking to Lifts-Her-Tail again). Well, cute dumpling, shall we take care of this spear together? (Lifts-Her-Tail walks towards him) Wait, no need to hurry! A good little Argonian like you must put her masters' guests at ease. Here, take off of me my tunic, the heat in this room is unsufferable [sic] (Lifts-Her-Tail does as he says). Better, much better now, but still... Do you see this beads of perspiration on my naked skin? Truly, it is a sign. Of what, we do not know, except that my clothes keep me too hot. Remove them at once and we will consider this business of ours about this spear (Lifts-Her-Tail knees before him and undoes his belt; delighted, Crantius Colto throws himself on the bed where he lies on his back).

Lifts-Her-Tail: Is there anything left that I could do to pleasure you, master?

Crantius Colto: Yes, yes, there is. Can't you see how the shaft of my spear is keenly standing up? Come closer, little one, closer. That's it, have no worries... (Crantius Colto sits up on the bed and throws his arms around Lifts-Her-Tail's waist who shivers in disgust). Your scales are even smoother than I would have dared to hope, cutie.

Lifts-Her-Tail: And you are filthier than I would have feared, Colto (before he reacts to what she said, she removes his arms from her waist, reaches for her broomstick and delivers him some blows on the back of his neck until he falls uncunscious [sic]).

(The curtain drops)